Great Tips to Make “Mom Friends”
If you’re wondering How to Make Friends as a Stay-at-Home Mom, I’m here to help.
Poof! In the blink of an eye, when you become a mom your entire social identity changes. If you’re lucky, you already have a group of women/ moms in your life to ease the transition.
But, if you’re like me, becoming a mom set me adrift on an island, consisting of me and my sweet baby.
You might not realize it, but, as a parent, you join a natural community of people sharing a similar experience. The way you choose to come together simply boils down to your own effort and personality. Introverts, like me, might find the process more challenging, but it’s not impossible.
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Related Article: How to Transition to Being a Stay-at-Home Mom
Where to Meet Parents
If you’re wondering where to meet mom friends in your area, you have a lot of options. Introverts may prefer to meet people online initially. If that’s the case, there are several ways to do that. If you’re ready to get out there, but just don’t know where to go, we’ve got that covered too!
Say what you want about social media, but one thing it does well is help people make connections. Near or far, it is a great way to instantly connect with people that share your interests.
Be as broad or as specific as you want. You can narrow your search to women with young children, or that have similar values, or maybe that share your faith.
The options are endless.
- Facebook– A quick search will provide a number of active mom groups for you to tap in to. Moms come together to share milestones, give advice and swap clothing, toys, etc.
- Twitter– Did you know that there’s a subset of Twitter referred to as “Mom Twitter?” Well, there is! I’m happy to have ‘met’ some great moms on Twitter. Not only moms, dads hang out there too. So, if you’re open to a barrage of dad jokes, I recommend you check it out.
- Instagram – This is a great platform for moms to show their personalities and interests. It’s also a way to connect, support and celebrate with each other.
- Pinterest – There’s not as much opportunity to interact with people on Pinterest, however, as a new moms, you have a visual album of tips, tricks, meals and stuff for baby at your fingertips. I’d consider this a resource, more than a way to create friendships.
Looking for mom friends? You’re in luck! There’s an app for that. Technology makes it easier than ever to help us solve our problems. These apps invite you to meet moms in your area. Meet virtually to start, then make plans out in the real world.
- Peanut – Make friends with other moms in your area that share common interests. It provides the opportunity to combine the convenience that social media gives with real life connections.
- Social.mom – Started by a lonely mom of two kiddos, Audrey said of Social.mom that it was, “An uplifting network of moms where we can cry together and also celebrate together.”
- Meetup – You might be familiar with Meetup through professional networking groups, or casual social groups, but it offers so many more ways of meeting and connecting with people.
- Nextdoor – This neighborhood app connects you with the people that live right around you! So, just by signing up, you’re halfway there. Not only can you keep up-to-date on any events taking place in your area, you can connect with other moms through the groups feature on the app.
Are you moving to a new area? Tapping into the apps or social media can help you make friends and familiarize yourself with the area in advance. By the time you arrive, not only will you have a new friend, but you’ll also be more familiar with your new home.
Out & About
Before social media, people met while out and about, while living their lives. It’s true!
These days, it’s far more common to meet people virtually. But, take a moment to consider who you run into when you’re not online.
If you look up from your screen, or better yet, put it away, you might realize that you see the same people when going about your day-to-day life.
From classes to the park and even your doctor’s office, you never know where you might find a new friend.
Look to your neighbors, or friends you may have lost touch with when they became parents. No need to wait until you have the baby to start making connections. If you meet some women expecting when you are, start developing those relationships before baby arrives!
Perhaps make connections through your OB. Ask whether they are aware of any mommy or prospective mommy groups. Doulas, midwives and lactation specialists can also be a good avenue for connection.
Classes usually take place over 4-6 weeks. The larger the area where you live, the more organized opportunities may be available to you. As you get more comfortable with the setting, you may find yourself talking to the same people each week.
Why not ask whether or not they would like to get coffee, ice cream, or a late dinner, after the next class? Chances are, they too are looking to make connections with other parents.
You never know, you just might make their day!
- Parenting Classes
- Childbirth Classes
- Lactation Support Groups
- Mommy & Me: Swimming, Yoga, Music, Storytime
- Church (Parenting groups)
If it hasn’t happened already, you will soon realize how much time you spend waiting around to take your kids home from one of their activities. And, the younger they are, the more time you spend loading and unloading your car. (Kids need so much stuff!)
Make use of this idle time. It just may offer another opportunity to chat with the other parents also stuck waiting around.
Also, don’t forget there are natural, almost forced opportunities to interact with other parents while supporting your kids. The PTA is one option, as well as room parent for some schools.
Fundraisers, fairs and assemblies are also places where parents congregate in groups.
- Team Sports
- School: Activities, Volunteering
- Classes/ Activities: Karate, Art, Dance
Why is Having Other ‘Mom’ Friends Important
Think about the people you befriended before you became a parent. What brought you together? When you’re young, friendship usually comes from proximity. You live in the same neighborhood or are in the same class.
But, as we get older, our friends start to align with our interests, attitudes and beliefs. We seek kinship and understanding from the people in our social circle.
It’s hard to convey the emotional weight of parenthood to your single friends. This is why having ‘mom friends’ may be important in your life.
Other moms are experiencing the same things you are. They can understand the exhaustion you feel to your core and how emotional you are about how your baby is developing.
Moms know, first-hand, what it feels like to have your life consumed by your little angel. Childless friends may find it harder to wave off unexpected spit up or a diaper blow out. Moms are not only unfazed, but willingly jump in to help get everyone cleaned up.
As a stay-at-home mom, having friends that understand what you’re going through can help you avoid isolation.
Spending hours alone with a baby that is always taking from you, can be depleting. Who better to understand when you just need a break!
It’s important for mom to have an outlet. Whether that’s a phone call, or a cup of coffee, or a message over social media. Not only can you spend time together, you can help each other with childcare and carpool.
Adult, human connection can help mom maintain not only her sanity, but also her identity.
Related Article: 24 Ways to Help New Moms
As you can see, there are several options for introverts and extroverts alike to make mom friends.
Friendship is beautiful and should be embraced and appreciated. Unlike family, friendship is a choice. We choose the people that we invite into our lives and share our most intimate thoughts.
By starting with social media, you can focus your search for people that meet your specific criteria. When you’re comfortable, make plans to get together, with or without your kids.
Should you replace your childless friends simply because you’re a mom? No, not at all.
But understand, as you are in different stages of your lives, they may not be as interested in your life as another parent.
Parenting an infant consumes all of your time, energy and mental/ emotional capacity. Add to that the pride and joy you feel for your little one; they comprise the totality of your every thought.
That kind of intense focus and devotion to your child is something all parents experience, but it doesn’t always translate to everyone we know.
But remember, maintaining those relationships could also benefit your mental well-being. When you have time for self-care, spend some of it with your childless friends.
It’s a good way to remain connected to the person you were before becoming a parent. Your new ‘mom friends’ are an addition to the people in your life; they are not there to replace anyone you cared for before.
Now that you know how to make mom friends as a stay-at-home mom, where do you think you’ll start first?
Related Article: Managing One Income to be a Stay-at-Home Mom
Have you experienced any challenges in making friends with other parents? Let me know what has, or hasn’t worked for you in the comments below.
14 thoughts on “How to Make Friends as a Stay-at-Home Mom”
I don’t have any kids but can imagine it must be hard making new friends that can relate and help with the change. I think that finding new activities and the groups sound like a great idea to find fellow parents to befriend!
I can remember the days before motherhood when my friends with kids talked about their kids and what was happening in their lives pretty consistently. I didn’t get it then, but I do now. They were sharing what was going on with them and I just didn’t see it like that. The conversations tended to be one-sided and again, I get it. It’s an overwhelming experience. So, it is so helpful to have friends who get it and friends that are experiencing different things. It would help things be more balanced. Thank you taking the time to read and respond.
I absolutely love this! As a single mum myself I can really relate to this! It can be so difficult to try and make friends whilst being a stay at home mum. Having twins myself I tried to keep them and myself busy! Thank you for sharing! Claire x
I’m still in such awe that you did the whole single parenting thing with twins! You are a inspiration for what can be done if you just try. We are just now breaking out of our little bubble and my kiddo has a social life, which is so great for her. Life is getting busier and busier which is good for both of us. It’s a tough road, but we’re taking it one step at a time.
Such a great post! I was lucky to have friends with children before I had my little one, including my best friend who has a 2 year old daughter. However, I definitely understand the isolation of being a stay at home mom. Although I work from home, those 4 walls are what I mostly see and the most interaction I get with another person is my daughter. I also live a bit far from my friends (about an hour) so I don’t realistically have the luxury of seeing them all the time. Being an introvert myself, I shy away from meeting new people but maybe I’ll try using your suggestions. Thank you for sharing, Cassie!
Thank you. My best friend also had her child 2 years before me. Unfortunately, we’re not in the same state. I wish I had the same courage I did as a kid; it would be so much easier to make friends. I’m sure your social world will open up when hers does. In some cases, you will be thrown into befriending other parents.
Thanks Maria. I appre4ciate you taking the time to read and comment.
I love that you have helped here with apps, that’s really useful. A good read. I actually made a group of friends from my antenatal classes and after our babies arrived we did so much together. You’re right also, go out and take note of others, small conversations can bring so much joy x
I love how you made friends in your antenatal class, Jeanette. What a perfect place to connect with the exact right group of people who know what you’re experiencing. There is usually an opportunity to meet people as long as we remain open to it. If not IRL, then technology can fill the gap for those who prefer that route.
Nice post Cassie. I have felt that emotion of not having friends. But once my son started going to school I was able to make new friends, when he started going to various activities classes, I found another chance of meeting other moms. It’s great to have mom friends who understand your emotions.
Thanks, Rupali! I feel like the way you made friends through your son’s school/ activities is the most natural path for me. My kiddo is starting to have a social life that is only going to grow. Once she starts kindergarten, I’ll start seeing the same parents at different events, which will be fun. You’re so right that being able to have mom friends who understand that whole parenting thing can make things feel easier. I appreciate you reading and commenting.
I don’t have kids but I can see why it would be very important to for moms to have other mom friends. It must be hard to not let your days be full of kids things and no grown up chats! Great article and very informative for moms 🙂
It can definitely be weird when all of your conversations are with children. I don’t always notice it, until I end up talking some poor adults ears off. I think we all benefit from surrounding ourselves with people who have an understanding of what we’re experiencing in life. It definitely makes things feel like you’re not alone.